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In honor of iHOb’s random marketing scheme, I declare this week’s column to be called This Week is Brash.
No? This joke is already so old and not funny? OK, my editors say we have to go back to calling it Trash.
Welcome to This Week in Trash, your one-stop destination to catch up on the news I am obsessed with you care about! I’m not going to lie, this week started off pretty slow, but then I knew it was going to be a biggie once the Handshake Seen Around the World, AKA the handshake between “Rocket Man” and “Tiny Hands” (not my words so I didn’t say ’em), AKA North Korea’s Kim Jong-Un and President Donald Trump, interrupted my viewing of The Bachelorette this week. Let’s get to it.
The World Cup is coming to North America.
FIFA has spoken: The 2026 World Cup will take place in the U.S., Canada, and Mexico, beating out Morocco for the bid. Sorry, Morocco, nobody wanted to come to your party. This is a really, really, really big deal because three countries hosting the World Cup together OVER A WHOLE CONTINENT has not been done like this before. Sure, for the more exclusive Euro Cup (think the same thing, but only European nations are participating), this is common, and Japan and South Korea previously jointly hosted in the 2002 World Cup, but it has never been three nations before. Considering the 2018 World Cup just kicked off yesterday, there is a lot to be hype about! Please DO NOT kill my vibe and tell me all of my faves will have retired by then. I have eight years to save up, but gauging some interest first: If I started a GoFundMe, would you donate to it?
We got a new version of “In My Blood.”
Something Shawn Mendes and I have in common? We are both trash for the Portugal national team. Although he grew up in Canada, Mendes has Portuguese roots and has always been a fan of the team and Cristiano Ronaldo. This is also the first time Mendes sang in Portuguese. Sure, the team is not in its prime like it was a couple of Cups ago, but they still deserve this jam. (I still remember the day where Portugal destroyed South Korea seven to nil on my birthday in during the 2010 World Cup in South Africa. Side note: And of course I was like, wow Ronaldo is doing this as my birthday present. Side side note: I hate myself.) It’s the perfect “turn down” song on the Uber home after a night of drinking.
We got a Degrassi reunion.
I’m not Upset. Drake dropped his latest video for his song I’m Upset, and it looks like he did ~*whatever it takes*~ to get the whole gang back together. I laughed at Spinner’s semi-serious walk, cried at how happy everyone looks, and I was ENRAGED when Rick showed up. Read our full breakdown, including throwback feels and adorable cast photos. I have so many follow up questions! @Drake, did Jimmy have surgery to walk again? pls respond.
We saw more hate on Twitter.
First of all, guys, what the eff? This isn’t even a funny. Stranger Things star Millie Bobby Brown left Twitter this week after months of a dumb meme flooding Twitter, dubbed #TakeDownMillieBobbyBrown. The tweets were fake stories or photos portraying Brown as homophobic and racist. “It appears the meme may have started ironically among fans, but at some point got way out of control,” Mashable says. In reality, MBB is an LGBT ally and even runs a whole separate Twitter account that fights against bullying. So, good job, guys.
We’re getting a Clueless musical.
In a world where nostalgia is in and everything throwback is trendy again, a Clueless musical is everything I need to make my heart sour. Amy Heckerling, screenwriter and director for the original 1995 movie, will return for new stage production titled Clueless, The Musical, which will come off-Broadway this fall. Am I missing this one? As if! Get more details here!
https://www.instagram.com/p/BjvHKHXnD-Z/?taken-by=arianagrande
Ariana Grande and Pete Davidson are reportedly engaged.
After dating for less time than a Bachelor couple, Ariana Grande and Pete Davidson are reportedly engaged. A source told Us Weekly that the couple is in no rush to get married and are just super happy and in love right now. The ring was supposedly around $100,000—but why is everyone so shocked about this? Like, duh. I think the best detail of all is that Davidson apparently called Nick Cannon before he proposed, who gave him his full blessing. Cannon also offered to officiate the wedding and I hope he does. Who are we to judge as long as they’re happy?
👦: Grandpa, do you remember the Great Burger Wars?
👴: lol no I was chillin drinkin milkshakes and trying to make sense of Westworld— Denny’s (@DennysDiner) June 11, 2018
Everyone trolled iHOb.
Whether you love it or hate it, everyone is talking about iHOP flipping that “p” around to a temporary “b.” No, it doesn’t stand for breakfast (or brunch, which I had hoped)—it stands for burgers. Now, all of our favorite snarky corporate social media accounts are poking fun at the restaurant, somewhat restoring any faith we had in the lighthearted roots of Twitter.
We get a Kingdom Hearts return date.
Behold—a trailer and release date for Kingdom Hearts 3! Fans have anxiously been awaiting this release for quite some time now—publisher Square Enix has even been absent from E3 since 2015. The trailer will take players into the Frozen universe, with appearances from Rapunzel, Wreck It Ralph, and other favorites. Although the game was supposed to launch sometime this year, the release date is now January 29, 2019 for PlayStation 4 and Xbox One.
We’re getting another season of Drag Race.
Ahead of the season 10 finale of RuPaul’s Drag Race later this week, VH1 greenlit the series for a new season. Season 11 of the show will follow a record-breaking 10th season, which is currently the most watched in franchise history. The aftershow, RuPaul’s Drag Race: Untucked was also renewed. Get ready for more sickening queens and killer lip syncs!
My boss texted me this video earlier and said “if you don’t like this, you’re fired.” pic.twitter.com/n9RTuPZeJs
— H0bbitQueen (@H0bbitQueen) June 10, 2018
We got The Office but with doggos.
Brighten your Friday with this adorable parody of The Office intro! The video features the floofiest doggo in all the land dressed as the iconic characters and imitating different actions from the intro, like photocopying a tennis ball, typing into a calculator, and even drinking from a “World’s Best Boss” mug. The cuteness will fuel me through the weekend.
Until next time, my beautiful trash babies!
