? Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SpongeBob SquarePants! ?
As everybody’s favorite sponge turns 20 this year, his O.G. fans are all grown up as well. We may not have been wearing makeup as awkward preteens, but now we can beat our faces to Bikini Bottom and back with Hipdot’s new SpongeBob makeup collection.
First of all, A+ on the packaging. All of the packages have a chic black background, with golden images of SpongeBob, Patrick, Sandy, and Gary — plus metallic bubbles, seaweed, and jellyfish — floating around. Don’t shoot the messenger, but some of the graphics inside the palettes seem to rub off easily. I only opened the blush and bronzer palette a few times, but the gold under the mirror was already worn off. Whatever, I don’t care.
When you hear about SpongeBob-inspired makeup, you probably don’t know what kind of crazy colors to expect, but this eyeshadow palette hits the nail on the head with 15 bright, beautiful colors worthy of the colorful, animated Nickelodeon show. Yes, they are wacky, like SpongeBob himself, but they appear way brighter in the palette than they do on your skin, and that’s a good thing.
There are both matte and shimmering eyeshadows, including deep teals and blues, jewel-toned purples and reds, two neutral tans, and even three shades of gold/yellow because you gotta’ rep the sponge!
I have big eyelids, so to avoid looking like a clown, I don’t really ever wear colored eyeshadow. But I swiped on a few of these loud colors to test them out, and they were all surprisingly sheer and blendable if you use a light hand when applying — even the bright yellow, believe it or not.
If you’re looking for a bolder look, just apply more layers to increase brightness, or mix different colors to create fun effects. It’s a great way for beginners to get more playful with their colors.
The color names will make you smile with their nods to the show, including “Bikini Bottom Blue,” “Imaginaation,” and “Meow Meow… Meow.” The entire makeup collection is also vegan, cruelty-free, paraben-free, talc-free, and mineral oil-free, which is important because who wants to test on bunnies?
This duo comes with a rosy blush and a very tan bronzer. The colors are matte and go on way more pigmented than the eyeshadow does, so make sure you use a good brush for blending. No one wants to look streaky, ya’ know?
The bronzer is definitely on the brown side and not orange at all, but whether it will match you or not totally depends on your skin tone. It was too dark for me, but it would have been good for contouring.
These candy-colored tubes may look like glow-sticks, but don’t be scared: The colors are way more transparent than they appear. Coral No. 5 looks like a pastel blue that might only be fit for Halloween, but when I swiped it over my lips, it was a like a translucent glossy sheen with a slight silvery hue that is very wearable on its own or over a pink lip. Feelin’ Fineapple looks like a super shiny, bright gold in the tube, but I swear, it’s more subtle on the lip, like a swipe of golden shimmer fit for a bronze, summery look. Sea Star Gazer looks bubblegum pink in the tube, but it wears like a clear gloss; the pink is light enough that it just blended in with my lips, but not in a bad way. The formula feels really glossy and nourishing — not sticky at all.
Face masks are life — usually. These printed masks are simultaneously terrifying and amazing, thanks to the fact that it looks like you skinned SpongeBob and Patrick’s faces off to wear them as your own. There were no instructions on how long to leave these masks on, so I used my imaaaagination. I guestimated 20 minutes, which may have been a poor choice because my face was burning a little. But I go with the flow. It left my skin feeling very sticky, suggesting that I was probably supposed to wash my face after using it. Oops; need some instructions next time. … ??♀️
To summarize: Thumbs up to the eyeshadow and the lipgloss, the blush/bronzer was OK, and the face masks were not my favorite, but the packaging is awesome. Overall, SpongeBob is the man, and I support the sponge.